With the Supreme Court dicking around with our right to choose, it’s essential that those of you in the reproduction zone understand how to prevent pregnancy. This goes out to all who play a role in baby-making.
It seems crazy but I have been parenting since the ripe old age of 11. Not parenting well. Because what 11-year-old with limited access to their own parents could? No, not parenting well since 11. But, I have been keeping babies, small children, tweens, and teens alive since then.
I think I’ve gotten much better in the last decade. Apologies to all those that came before (you know who you are). I’m trying anyway, to support the development and thriving of the youths. But 11-year-old me could not have been great because 19-year-old teen parent me was clearly substandard by my current definition. 30-year-old me was not tons better tbh.
So how does an 11-year-old become a caregiver? In my case I’d like to point the finger of judgment directly at the Catholic Church’s tutelage that led my mother and stepfather to produce 3 babies in 3 years, without a means to support or care for said babies. Thanks big C for the parentification of my childhood. Super great.
You’d think that I’d have learned my lesson and steered clear of babies but alas, no. The lessons I took to heart from my upbringing were in this order: Abortion is evil, contraception is shameful (and expensive), and sex is definitely something I gotta do.
I had a fertile womb but no concept of how to keep it unpeopled. So 19-year-old me birthed a fussy, screamy child with limited means to support said child. Again, thanks big C.
Now, I love my kids, but wow, what a hard, heartbreaking journey it has been. I’m glad my adult offspring have waited to reproduce. While I hope to someday welcome grand-family, there is no rush and hopefully they will have time to select the best circumstances for such an endeavor.
So what can you do? Well, first, for those of you with vaginas + uteruses or penises, I recommend you get a copy of Toni Weschler’s Taking Charge of Your Fertility, 20th Anniversary Edition: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Reproductive Health. This 5-star book has been ranked higher by customers on Amazon than all other books, except the third and fourth Harry Potters.
Though the Rhythm Method was fallible, the science behind fertility tracking and the tools you have to help monitor your fertility have come a long way in 20 years. According to the author, “A woman trained in Fertility Awareness knows that she needs a phase of at least 10 days from ovulation to menstruation for implantation to later occur, and that 18 consecutive high temps after ovulation almost always indicates a pregnancy.” If you reside in a state with limited or no access to abortion, that knowledge is key. Get the book. Get it from the library if you can. Get it for a friend. Get it for your teen or tween. Just get it.
MORE REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS RESOURCES
National Network of Abortion Funds (NNAF): Directory of local abortion funds that will help cover the cost of abortion for folks who are unable to afford it. These are the on-the-ground folks who will ensure that people will be able to continue to access care. https://abortionfunds.org/
Aid Access: Resources for receiving abortion pills by mail. https://aidaccess.org/en/
Plan C Pills: Additional resources on abortion pills. https://www.plancpills.org/
All-Options: A hotline available for people to discuss and process reproductive health decisions. https://www.all-options.org/find-support/talkline/